Raphy Feolino and I are both in the 2CCX. Russell Brunson’s high end coaching program. I have gotten to see Raphy and his wife build their relationship coaching program from the ground up. I thought I would bring him on to talk about what he does. In part 1 of the interview we talked about the trials and tribulations, the struggles, the successes of building their business. In part two here we go deep on what his business actually does. Who they help. Aka their avatar. And all the fun stuff around that. Their program is all about building the foundation for a good marriage. They specifically work with couples who aren’t married. I.e. they are helping you get married. Not saving your marriage!
Raphy Feolino and I are both in the 2CCX. Russell Brunson’s high end coaching program. I have gotten to see Raphy and his wife build their relationship coaching program from the ground up. I thought I would bring him on to talk about what he does. In part 1 of the interview we talked about the trials and tribulations, the struggles, the successes of building their business. In part two here we go deep on what his business actually does. Who they help. Aka their avatar. And all the fun stuff around that. There are good relationship tips and tricks for all who listen.
Their program is all about building the foundation for a good marriage. They specifically work with couples who aren’t married. I.e. they are helping you get married. Not saving your marriage!
Their Holly Couples Coaching program: https://journeytomarriage.com/coaching/
Their Dating To Discern Couples challenge here: https://www.datingtodiscern.com/
Him and his wife sarah, at the time of this recording, have an almost two year old and a three month old. It’s stressful. They are grateful for what they learned to build such a strong foundation for their relationship. One that is helping them thrive through this time. And they want to pass it on through their coaching program.
Raphy gets a bit into the futility of his dating and how he used that as a spring board to communicate with his wife.
The importance of having the hard conversations with your partner right out of the gate.
The power of their faith based frameworks. They take their couples through a whole journey. And by the end you’re probably gonna know if you should be married!
The power of turning your differences into your strengths.
Hey talks about some amazing couples successes.
The coolest thing I think. Is they have a relationship assessment that grades your relationship on 5 or 6 different parameters. And you get so see a before and after based on your scores. You literally get tangible results and scores that you can look at.
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Transcript:
Mischa Zvegintzov
Welcome, everybody to the table rush masterclass where we get back to the marketing and sales basics to help entrepreneurs like you grow your business to $1 million and beyond. And today, I am very excited to introduce to you, Rafi and this last name is great. It's almost as good as mine, Rafi feel lino and Sarah, who's hiding in the background? Well, welcome Rafi.
Raphy Feolino
What's up, Misha, thanks for being here. And thanks for not butchering my name. Like, that's good. Like, both both my like the first name and the last name. Somebody gets it all mixed up. I'll know how like it's kind of pretty, like straightforward. But you got it. And I, I really enjoyed this interview. So thank you for having me on.
Mischa Zvegintzov
Indeed, it's so good to have you have quick we have we have some roots together. And that we're in this high end coaching program. It's called the two comma club X. It's a significant financial investment, which I love. And I'm proud to invest in myself. I know you have as well. It's with Russell Brunson. And I've just got to watch your journey through this for the last year, year and a half. And so my goal here today is just to talk about what you do, and the amazing work you're doing. Right now, this will be our part one of the interview. So if that's cool, and you have what's called holy couples coaching, and anybody can check it out in the link below Journey to marriage.com. It's a great website, you can schedule a call to it's all about, about about bringing spirituality into your into your marriage, right? And it's based it's got a Christian or Catholic, yes to it. Correct? Yeah,
Raphy Feolino
yeah, we primarily work with couples who aren't married. Because we see that there's like, plenty of marriage enrichment stuff. But like, we're trying to figure out, like, who's helping the people that want to get married?
Mischa Zvegintzov
Mm hmm.
Raphy Feolino
Cuz that's a significant step of your relationship. Right? Like, you don't just have a good marriage, like, just because you get married? It's like, what is the foundation that you have to build to have that, that good marriage? Because the reality is marriage, when you're in it, man, there's a lot of responsibilities. We just, we just became parents. I mean, like, I would say, we're still new to parenting and everything, we have a, an almost two year old, and we just had a three month old, just recently. So it's, it's difficult. Like, I'm glad that we we had a like work on relationship before we had to go through these transition points. And that's the gift that we wanted to help other couples to not come into marriage, like being reactive, and like trying to figure things out, because in itself is it's pretty stressful if you don't know how to really do the basic essential things that unfortunately, nobody really teaches us School doesn't teach us how to communicate and all these these things that we teach our couples, so yeah,
Mischa Zvegintzov
fantastic. I love the purpose, a noble cause, right? And and I say that with a full open heart, like, hey, let's, let's set people help people who are on the path to marriage. Let's set them up for success. Right. And I'm looking at your website now. And I think it's awesome. So when everybody's watching here, or you're watching me and I look over here, it's because I've got another screen and I'm looking at your stuff. So I see we've got this whole before and after. Not a framework but but you've got different metrics of before and after. growth area possible growth area, possible strength, strength area, and then you break it down even into I'm having trouble reading it got awfully small. But you have like financial relations, right? You've got all these different things. Yeah, I see that you've got you've had success like I see we've got Nico and Sam who there before and after metrics went up dramatically. So you've got a whole system writer, Vicki and Laney you've got a before and after. So quickly. Tell me a little bit about that.
Raphy Feolino
Yeah, so that assessment that you see that's the number one marriage and relationship assessment in the world was called Preparing rich and because because like it's kind of hard to tangibly like understand like how like how your communicate like the health of your communication, like how you guys handle finances as a couple like, all these different facets of your life. It's kind of hard to to put them into like, are we getting better or getting worse? Like, where are we at? So we wanted to create something where objectively couples can see, like, what are the areas? They're there they have strong points on and and what are the areas that they should really focus on growing, especially before coming into marriage, because there's a lot of conversations that we help our couples really dive into, that they may have not have talked about. Until they start working with us. Because when they start working with us, we get them to be very intentional about the time that they're putting in their relationship and working with us. So yeah, we had like, before we actually go through our coaching program, that's like our first initial call. We help them to see objectively what their relationship look like. Because, you know, couples are like, Oh, our relationship is fine. Like, I don't even know why we're doing this thing. Most of the guys are like that. They're like, I don't know why we're doing this, like we known each other for years. Like, we're fine. Yeah. But they do this assessment. And they're like, dumbfounded. Really like, Wait a minute. Yeah. So we have one of one of our couples that we want to talk about. They were actually about to get married, like four months later, before we actually started working with them. And they, when we started working with them really like they felt like pretty on on tune with everything. And they're like, oh, yeah, we're fine. Like, I'm sure everything is good. But we'll try this out. They got the report, and they actually ranked the lowest that you can in that assessment is like conflicted couple, right. And they saw that and they're like, oh, my gosh, like we're about to get married in four months. And it seems like we're not on the same page. Like it felt like we were on the same page. But that's what's powerful about like, the objectivity of assessments like this. So we were able to do that they, they, they went through the process, we helped uncover a lot of the things that they couldn't see. And that's what that's the power of having a coach. And then after our program, they became a vitalized. Couple. So what a vitalized couple is the top rank that you can that you can measure in that assessment. So within just a few months of working with us, they went from the lowest to the highest rank. And they weren't even married. And I think that blows up a lot of people's mind as well. Because they think like, oh, we should be working on a relationship when we're married. Like, that's when we should be doing it like no, like, why, why wait, you're gonna be you're gonna be doing these things throughout your life, regardless, why not learn it so early on in your relationship, so you don't get into those, those places where you're building these bad habits, and all these things, because that's exactly what I had to experience. Like, I wish I would have known this early on in my dating stages. But, I mean, I feel like God has given me that purpose. He put all these challenges in my life so that my wife and I could do this type of work.
Mischa Zvegintzov
But yeah, fantastic. I want to get to that in a moment that God has given you this purpose, because I think that's what's so powerful about what you do. It's so much work to create something like this to create a structure to help people and to bring a message to market. Right. And, and so to have a powerful why we're gonna get to that in a minute. But really quick, on this Oh, and so that I love the idea of a measurable, right you in such an esoteric space, you've said, here's a measure of here's the measurables that we can look at, and I think they're beautiful. So now I'm looking at and we've got communication, conflict resolution, partner style and habits, financial management, leisure activities, sexual expectations, family and friends, relationship roles. And the last one is spiritual beliefs. And so, obviously, as I just say that if you can grow your competency or capabilities in those areas with your partner, how powerful is that? Especially heading into a marriage, right? Like yeah, yeah, super powerful. Yeah. So awesome. Tell me
Mischa Zvegintzov
like how it's a lot of work, and it's a lot of pain, a lot of growth opportunities. How about that to put something like this together? Like what's the how What was the pain point where you and your wife are like? Did you have an experience? And so your relationship was struggling and you? And then you're like, we've Wow, how powerful Tell me? Does that make sense?
Raphy Feolino
Yeah, so actually, it goes even way before my wife like before, when I met my wife, like, everything started getting a little bit better. Like I started dating the right way. When I, when I initially met her, we dated the right way. And we ended up getting married in just a few months. But before, like, before I met her, I was dating all these other women. And I didn't know exactly like, what the purpose for dating was. So I'd be in these relationships for years and years. And you know, I'm hearing like people's advice, like, oh, yeah, take your time, have fun, go travel and do all these things. And I did. So I spent years of my life dating, I want to talk about this, the certain individual, I dated this one, one girl for over five years, without having like, intention or purpose, but because I guess, just looking back at it, I just wanted significance I wanted to be loved. And I thought I was doing all the right things. So it kind of got to a point where I was like, Okay, we've been together together for like five years. Like, what's the next step of marriage? Right? So in my mind, I was like, Okay, let me go ahead and propose her because that's what everybody is doing. Like, again, not really having any purpose or intention. And then,
Mischa Zvegintzov
how old are you quick, at this point? How old are you?
Man, I think I was like 24, or 25, when I was engaged before I met my wife. So when this happened, just a few months afterwards, I had a spiritual director as well. And he was the one as much as I love him to death. Like, he was very honest with me, as a good director, or coach should have been, but when we're engaged, and I was kind of like sharing to my spiritual director, like, the challenges that we're facing, he helped me to realize how toxic my relationship was, that I couldn't really see. Which really, it kind of blew my mind because I've been in the relationship for five years. So I thought, like, you know, like, Oh, I think we got this, we're good. And we're gonna get married all these things. And then our, my spiritual director is like, Yeah, but you guys are like constantly arguing, like, how are you guys are communicating is just not solid for marriage. And like, he started just really pointing out the things that I hated him for doing, but I love him at the same time for doing because I got out of a potential future divorce. Like if we were to go into marriage, having the same habits and not having that intentionality to work towards the things like, I'm sure that marriage wouldn't have worked out very well. So I got out that relationship.
Raphy Feolino
And I realized, like, man, there's a lot of things I didn't know about relationships. And I kind of went on this whole journey as a single man, like, understanding like, what is my role as a man in a relationship like, and I started picking up books like, men are from Mars, Women are from Venus, like, I didn't want to go through that pain again, Misha, like it sucked. It's I was five years plus of my life, like going through all this toxicity, not even seeing it. And getting engaged now having to break that, like, our families were upset about that, like, with me, like they're excited, like, Oh, we're getting married, and I had a break that off. I'm like, this sucks, like, if I'm gonna start dating somebody, again, like, I got to do it the right way. So I started like doing my personal development, reading, really just getting focused in my faith, because I felt like there wasn't really a faith foundation in that relationship as well as kind of doing whatever. And, yeah, like, just through that whole journey of being single and really developing myself. I felt I was I felt like I was ready to start dating again.
Raphy Feolino
And when I met Sara, in Hawaii, I was I was serving in the military at the time. I met her and it's funny because when I met her, I was actually discerning to not be married. So I'm a Catholic, and I was actually discerning to become a priest. So in the Catholic traditions, priests don't get married. Okay, and so when I met her I was just like, Oh, what a distraction She must be a distraction. I'm just gonna do my thing. A test. Yeah, our test like Oh, thanks, God, like, but I'm gonna stay on the path. But amazing. It's crazy when like, it's funny when you when you tell God your plans, he has better plans for you. So as much As I was trying to focus on Yeah, as much as I was trying to focus on preset, there was this growing desire in my heart to want to get to know her. And it just kept growing and growing, growing. And then finally, he's like, alright, God, let's try this out, start dating her doing it the right way. And really just getting to know her, rather than doing all the physical stuff and getting caught up and all that mess, but really just getting to know her her soul, like her values or beliefs, we started having the hard conversations early on a relationship, which then it gave me the clarity that to be like, just in a few months of dinner, I was like, That's the girl I want to marry for the rest of my life. And I'm like, wow, I found that out in just a few months, versus all these other relationships where I was just dating for years and spent like, wasting all this time. But I know just looking back, it's, it was like God allowed that for for a purpose. And I learned from that, um, and all the challenge. I'm grateful for all that. Because yeah, this is where we are now. Now we teach the couples to avoid practically what I did. And what she did, because she has her own story as well that I'm sure she would like she shares as well with our couples. But we both had a similar, similar journey, like we both dated, just to have fun. And, you know, but yeah, that's what we do now.
Mischa Zvegintzov
Boy, I love the have the hard conversations in the beginning parts of the relationship, how powerful of a thought that is right? Like, let's cut to the chase. And yeah, and do you have a strategy around that of how to have those conversations?
Yeah, I mean, definitely, I remember the first conversation. I mean, I think the first heart conversation, we were like, about almost a month into our dating relationship. And I was like, What are your thoughts about pornography? Like, do you watch porn? And it was awkward. Like, I was so terrified to actually ask this question. Because I've, I've struggled with this in the past as a, like, young adult, like, I was introduced to pornography, when I was like, 1314 years old, and like, it has transitioned to my adulthood, and it has, it has just rewired my brain into a toxic way, like how I see women, how I see sex and all these things. So I wanted to kind of get to understand her and what she's experienced. And like, I was coming into this conversation, like, oh, this girl is gonna break up with me, like, once I share with her, like, my truth and all that stuff. But what what, like all these fears that I had actually turned into one of the most fruitful conversations we had, we started talking for like, a deep, maybe two hours around, around this around our struggles around sexual expectations, especially when it comes to marriage, and all these things. And I think all of the things boiled down to creating that safe environment to communicate, like I was coming in here. And both of us were coming in here, to create a safe environment to, for us to be vulnerable, not for us to be there to criticize each other to be like, Oh, why do you do that? Like, all these things. And when we when we came with that attitude of, hey, we're, we're on the same team. Let's create this safe environment for us to have this conversation that allow us to open up and not have to get into those crazy arguments that we've been in the past, like, whenever, that's the reason why I didn't want to talk about like hard stuff in my past relationships, because whenever that would happen, we would just fight, we would argue it would get toxic. So again, we wanted I wanted to do something differently. And yeah, just creating a safe environment was the key. And now like whenever we have those, because the hard conversations still happen, yes, they're not so hard. Because we we've done it so much throughout our dating or engagement throughout our marriage. Like the things that are hard for many couples are not very hard for us, like we talk about everything. We don't leave anything on a table and I think it's very valuable, especially in a relationship like you want to be able to share everything with that partner, especially if you see that partner to be with for the rest of your life. Like you don't want to hold anything back.
Mischa Zvegintzov
So yeah, I love that. Thank you for that answer. I'm writing down two things, which I want to circle back around. One is I have a question and you don't need to answer it now but I want to address it which we'll get to I'm sure is is you can teach or you to with your framework with your program with your with your holy couples coaching program. Imagine Can you I want to ask the audience can you imagine having the hard conversation with love and having it go well, and being a platform for growth and intimacy, versus tension and mayhem, right, like, wow, how amazing is that? Right? Oh, yeah. But so you're able to teach that, right how to how to do that. I'd love that. So I just want to make sure I take a note on that on the hard conversations. I love how you said, things that are hard for other couples are now easy for you and Sarah, because you've practiced it, you apply this framework. And you've I don't know if Transcender is the right word, but you've transcended sort of that, that that pain and frustration again, to worse now, it's an opportunity for intimacy. And I think that that's beautiful. Would you agree without
Raphy Feolino
Yeah, 100%. Because both of us, we still have those negative emotions, right? We're always we still get frustrated, angry, stressed. We were parents are still trying to figure this whole thing out transitioning from one to two children. So it's stressful. You were in a little bit of it. Yeah. And so the tension happens, the frustration happens, but how we go about, like using that those emotions, and really understanding our emotions and communicating our emotions, like those are the keys that allowed, that allows us to communicate even when we feel like everything's going crazy right now. But again, like without those frameworks, I don't even know where we'd be, it would be it would be terrifying. Like, Oh, yeah.
Mischa Zvegintzov
How amazing is that? To have some frameworks to utilize and based in your faith, I just think that that is so powerful and amazing. Yeah, that's beautiful. And what a gift you have to offer in that regard. So So you've got this holy couples coaching program now. And and and I'm assuming we've got steps in there. You take people through a process, right? And ultimately, to become a vitalized. Couple. And I love that vitalized couple who who doesn't want to be a vitalized? Couple? Right? Yeah, it's beautiful. So tell me about the what's the strategy, tell me the overarching strategy of the holy couples coaching program?
Yeah, so the holy couples coaching program. Because, you know, like, when we when we think about relationship experts, we think about like communication and conflict resolution, I think that was like the basis of what I knew about when I was reading a bunch of relationship books is always about communication and conflict resolution. But then, like Sarah, and I were thinking, there's so many other things, though, that affects a relationship that should be talked about that, that they should, as a couple develop skills around. So as you can see, like, our program is not just a communications program, or conflict resolution program. So it's like, a personal development, like, let's talk about all the facets because all of these affect the relationship. So let's not leave anything out like The number two reason why a couple of divorces is actually finances. Right. Number one is actually communication, like infidelity. And I know there's could be all the different types of reasons why cheating happens and stuff. But a lot of is stems from the connection, the connection that a couple of hours, they don't know, they had to struggle with sustaining that. And there's like a compromise in their connection where they don't feel safe, and they want to find intimacy somewhere else. So like, knowing like financial management is like, up there, why couples have wars like we had, we had to create a program where we had to talk about everything, and teach all these different things.
Raphy Feolino
But the foundation when we first start off with a couple it, we do talk about the communication and resolving conflict. Why? Because all those other things sex, talking about sex, talking about finances, if you know how the found if you don't know how to communicate about this, you're screwed. Like, these are hard things. Like you're gonna be talking about debt and all these things. And yeah, you don't want to, like you don't want to just like strength, like what are you doing with your money? Like, I don't want to marry you like, no, like, we want to teach them how to communicate in a in a non judgmental way, in a place where they create that safe conversation, so that they can better know and understand their experience because the reality is like in a relationship, like we have both completely different worldviews, which is beautiful. And we can use those two different worldviews and experiences for an advantage or we can use it and be like, Oh, you're wrong. For having to live life that way, right? And that's one of our big challenges like, where are couples, they want their, they want their partner to be just like them. And so they try to change them and tread for life. And we try to help them understand like, hey, no, you've got to understand that your partner was made by God and His image and likeness, like, he's like he or she was make unique. So use those and leverage those differences to actually become a strength versus a source of conflict. So that's why we really talk we really hone in and how they communicate how they resolve conflicts, so that when they do talk about finances, when they do talk about sex, when they do talk about family and friends and boundaries, and all these things, they have that foundation of how do we communicate about these topics in a healthy manner? And how do we create strategies as a couple to, to, to, to increase and to turn these areas into strengths in our relationship?
Raphy Feolino
So yeah, we put them through that whole journey. And then at the end of the program, they get to see like, we'll we'll show them it. Again, it's not their opinion, like they could say, oh, my relationship is good. Or we can say like, all the things like it's, it's all objective. So that assessment is an objective thing, like how they answer the questions, it actually shows you like, have you guys improved? Have you guys actually done the work and the vast majority of our couples, like 97% of our couples who actually do the things that we tell them to do in our program, turn into the vitalized couple, which is the highest rank in that assessment. And they're not even married, which blows our minds like, these are couples who are dating, these are couples who are engaged, who have already got to the peak of their relationship. And now they're coming into marriage with such momentum with such a, like a strong foundation, because I think like in the statistics of that assessment, less than 10% of married couples even measure as vitalized. So, I mean, and that I think those decisions were really like a long time ago. And if you think about relationships now, like you see the divorce rates, like they're rising, and all these things, so I'm sure that that statistic is like even smaller. So the fact that we're helping couples that are not married to get to that level of vitalized, before even entering into marriage, I think it's powerful. And that's what our program does, we get them to that. And also, it helps them to have that, that now that they're a vitalized couple, especially if they're dating. Like they, they now have that clarity and confidence to take that next step in the relationship.
Because just like me, when we were when we were dating, like I didn't know, like, I was like, Okay, we're dating for years and years, like, when should we do it? And I kind of guess, and I was like, Okay, we've been dating for five years. So let's get married. But now when they go through this program as a dating couple, and they get to have the hard conversations, they get to develop their skill sets. Like, they they come out, like having so much confidence and be like, hey, like, this is a couple, this is a person that I could grow so much with right now. Like, what can what would that look like in marriage? And that's what gets them excited to take that next step. And yeah, that's what our couples do they actually get engaged.
Raphy Feolino
Like, they'll start in our, in our program as a dating couple. And then they get engaged like after afterwards, they have that clarity and confidence, like, yeah, I want to marry this person, and I want to serve this person for the rest of my life. And I think that's powerful. Because, yeah, through that process, it can kind of get scary, because marriage is a big commitment man, like, you know, it's a lifelong commitment. That's what we believe, as Catholics, and I know they've experienced a lot of different things, maybe having divorce household or there could be a lot of confidence issues. So just being able to provide that for couples is very powerful.
Mischa Zvegintzov
It's extremely powerful. I want to say a couple things. One, just the thought of Imagine your differences as a couple now being your strengths. Like how powerful is that right? Like to instead of being conflict and like, you need to mold to me now. It's like, well, wait a minute. No, these these differences are strengths. And I just think that that's beautiful. So thank you for that. And then, to get the clarity and confidence to know that you want to get married, like how powerful is that? I love that thought. Right? Like that's, that's amazing. So that's very cool. And then you said, I think if I heard you right, the clarity and confidence to get married and serve this person for the rest of their lives, right. That's beautiful. So that's it. great vision. Thank you. Yeah. So, so you, you and again, you have couples that you have brought to the process. And again, people can see it at your website at the journey to marriage.com Ford slash coaching, the link will be in the notes here. So everybody check it out. But you can see couples like the before and after of that metric of that measurable, you know, pre vitalized vitalized. And I think that's awesome. But you're having success with this. And then people have literally, if I heard you correctly, go through your program. And like, we know, it's time to get married. Yeah. Yeah. So they take the test, first test, first assessment, right, like step one is take the assessment coaching call with you and your wife, take the assessment. Step two, teach communication and resolution and resolution tools. Yeah. And then what's step three? Now strategies? So I heard you say, create strategies. So tell me about that bit like the strategies do you look at the weaknesses? Or opportunities for growth? That's maybe a better way to say it along that scale? And so you're like, Alright, so tell me about that.
Raphy Feolino
Yeah, so like, our program is done in a group. So we go, we have all of our couples goes through all the different facets, even if it's a strength area for them. Because one of the things that we realize when our couples learn our frameworks, like when you're when you're teaching finances, in the perspective of a couple versus like an individual, like, they learn so much from that, and handling finances, like as a couple, like how do we do this together versus like, individually? So yeah, like when when they built that foundation, we teach them more skill based things that that would apply to them as an individual. But also, they would have, they would understand, like how that would actually look like, if they would get married. Because there's certain things like, that we don't teach like we don't. Like we don't teach them like we would teach married couples, certain things. And then the people who are still like discerning and trying to figure out they should get married, like, we teach up, we kind of like, teach them what they need to know right now and their stage of the relationship. Oh, yeah. So because it changes, like the conversations kind of changed when you're going from dating to engage to marriage, like, the things kind of change? So yeah, we so it's a lot of that we talk a lot about skill based things versus theory, because I think one of the things that we hear because a lot of our couples, they go through our, the church for resources for like, marriage, and like pre marriage enrichment. A lot of a lot of the feedback that we hear is like, Oh, when I go through these programs, it's very, like theory based, like, yeah, what is marriage, like, its importance and the sacredness of marriage, but it doesn't really teach like, how do you actually do it? That's what we teach. We teach, like, not we put the theory that the church provides as what marriage should be. And we should we actually teach it, like, how do you actually do it? How do you put that in practice? Like, what are the daily habits? What are the daily things that you should actually be doing? To actually prepare yourself for that holy marriage that you actually desire? It's not something that you just do. And you're like, Okay, we're married, and everything's fine. Yeah, it takes work takes work takes work.
Mischa Zvegintzov
Can I ask you a question? Yeah. So do you, you you bring someone new? When do you start groups at the same time? So you bring together a group of people? And then do you have, like, four modules? Or six modules? Or What? What? Yeah. How's that work?
Raphy Feolino
Yeah. So we bring the group in. And so we go, we we have them go through the modules all together. But then we have like masterminds, where we have the couples come together, and actually mastermind because, as I'm sure you have experienced being in the mastermind that we're part of, it's powerful. Like when you have all these different minds and experiences like that you can tap into it's super powerful. So we're like, why don't we bring this not just in the business space, but in the relationship space, and they're powerful, like when we have these couples come together? And they're all like sharing and learning from each other teaching their own frameworks to other couples, like, it's crazy. And a lot of like breakthroughs start to happen. I think like that's one of our biggest feedback like that. They feel like they're not alone. They're actually around other couples who are crazy like them that they want to work on the relationship before marriage and It's just a supportive community where we pray together, where we struggle together where we share, like, our successes together. And yeah, like, so we do that every, every week we do our masterminds and stuff like that. And yeah, and they see it, like, we all talk about the same things, because they're all going through the program at the same time. So it's really powerful.
Mischa Zvegintzov
Tell me about your favorite success, like your top two or three favorite couple success stories.
Raphy Feolino
Ah, so one of them actually just happened recently. They, they, they started off when they're dating. And they had an idea that they wanted to get married, but they just didn't know how to actually get to those next steps. And I remember what because there's also a component where they could actually book a call with us, like, if they want that personal mentorship throughout our program. It's not just a bunch of code, there's not just a bunch of videos that they watch, like, they can talk to a coach in our programs. So they, it was like, towards the end of our program, they booked a call with us, and they're like, Man, I don't know if we should get married. And it was crazy, because me and Sarah, like, we're seeing their growth, and like, they're crushing it, they're contributing to the group. But then like, they're having these limiting beliefs. Like, I don't know, if we should get married, like, they're having like, all these fears, these concerns that were resurfaced, like surfacing. And we kind of got to understand the couple and see that they both came from different, like family backgrounds. I know one of them had a divorce, that divorced parents, so she had like, a lot of these insecurities like, I don't know if I should, like this scary. And after that call, we help them to realize like, what they're actually doing, like, the growth that they've been experiencing for just a few weeks working with us. And they came out of the colleges, like, there's a different energy about them, you know, what they, you know, how it feels like, when someone comes to you, and they feel like confused, like, I don't know, but then like when something clicks, there's like a different energy. They're like, Okay, we're on the right path. We're doing things the right way. And they finish our program. Just a few months afterwards, they just got engaged recently, they just got engaged and reached out to us like, hey, we did it. Like, we're now we're preparing for marriage. And we could like, they had to get out of that mental block those mental fears. And that's what's so important, like having a mentorship, because if I didn't have my mentors, I probably would have stuck in that relationship, to be honest. Yeah, like I probably before, before I met Sarah, like I probably would have continued that probably would have gotten married, because no one would tell me the honest truth, no one would have told me and so being able to pray that for it for a couple like was really powerful. So I thought that was really powerful. And like what I share with you that that last couple were there for months before their wedding date, and they were just not on the same page. And they're like, oh, shoot, we got to figure this whole thing out. We're about to spend the rest of our lives together. And they put in the work like, and he got uncomfortable, like, the things that they're talking about, they started to see that there were significant differences. But they decided they chose to use those differences to become strengths. They decided to learn from their families, cultures, and created their own culture as a couple, they came out of that program becoming vitalized, they got married, and they have their first child now their parents, and it's just this is a joy to see that like to see them at the altar to see their transition points and having children and all these things. And I'm like, man, it's so cool to just play a role in that journey. And, and now she actually reached out to us recently, and she was like, You guys inspired me to want to be a life coach. So now she's one of our past clients is now looking into becoming a coach because of the impact that we've made on her. And now that she wants to pay that forward to other people. And it just, it just makes it just brings us so much joy because it's a ripple effect, right? Usually, like, it's not just us serving these couples, and it it just staying there. But like having served these couples, they want to teach the things that they're learning from us to other couples, because this again, is not taught in schools like unfortunately. And we were made for relationships, like God made us for relationships. He didn't make us to make a bunch of money, like all these things that the world tells us that we have to do. Like he made us for relationships, so why not master this area of our life and become really good at relationships. And yeah, now it's like, is spreading out of our control. So I think that's exciting. That's what we're excited about coming into the new year.
Mischa Zvegintzov
It's beautiful. That's amazing. Rafi key for that. I want to encourage anybody, everybody watching and listening, of course, go to journey to marriage.com checkout, checkout Rafi and Sara's amazing program, there's great content to look at, you can book a call to what to figure out if it's worth jumping in the program, I suppose, right?
Raphy Feolino
Yeah, um, we're actually, we're actually gonna be shifting this part of our program. Um, there's gonna be a different way. Because like with our program, we don't like to take in any, like everybody in anybody. This program is good for specific, specific couples. And now like in order for for couples to get into our program, they actually have to apply, they have to apply, we actually look through their application, and we have to prequalify them before we actually get on to a call with them. And we'll be up front like if they don't meet the standards of what we're looking for, we would have to, like send them away and get we'll give them other resources that you can learn because there's other like self paced stuff that we do. We do workshops, and stuff. But in our coaching program, yeah, there's been like an application process. And we're actually, we're in the process of revitalizing that, because we wanted to close things up for this year, but starting next year, 2022 we have things that we're ready to start bringing people into our coaching program and
Mischa Zvegintzov
perfect, it's basically finding out that, hey, these people are the best fit to work with you spiritually aligned, all aligned in a proper way. And perhaps, you can validate, yeah, you're ready to do this work. Right. And and make sure that again, it's a good fit. I think that's very smart. And helps ensure success for for both. For both sides, right? Definitely. Yeah, that's awesome. Cool, by the time people see this, or let's pretend it's four years later, go to journey to marriage.com Fill out the application and see if you qualify for help. Yes. That's amazing. I think that this is a good place to to end this part of, of our of our of our interview here, but I did want to make sure. Did I miss anything there? Was there anything that you were hoping to say or address that you didn't get to say?
Raphy Feolino
No, I felt like that was a pretty fun. That was fun. Yeah, I think that was good. I think you hit a lot of you asked the right questions, and I shared a lot about what our program was and all that stuff. So yeah, yes. Good.
Mischa Zvegintzov
Yeah. Good. Fantastic. Again, everybody got to journey to marriage.com and, and, and meet Rafi and Sarah and see see if if you're ready to become a vitalized couple and thank you so much